That dirty four-letter word

by mkwasny on May 8, 2012 at 7:16 am
Posted In: Blog

Yes, it rears its ugly head at every turn. The word that makes mice out of men and sends great multitudes running away in fear. You know the word well…

W-O-R-K!

Because some days, it’s not easy jumping into the humor mode. You just got laid off from work or an unexpected bill came in the mail or your pet rock died and failed to leave a will… and the last thing you want to do is smile or to just humor your way through it.

But here is my kind and gentle response… TOUGH! Do it anyway.

We already know that when you are smiling or laughing, your creativity and problem-solving mechanisms kick in. You are able to get perspective and clarity and what may seem like insurmountable problems become opportunities.

Back to humor mode

I remember when I got let go from a writing job I was doing. “Financial difficulties” was the response they gave when I asked them why. Times are tough, these things happen. Except that for me, it was now the third time in five years and each one for the same reason (mental note: be sure to ask prospective client if they are financially able to afford my services before contracting with them!)

And when this third client decided to let me go, all I could do was laugh. I mean, this is laughable! Three times? Really? So what should I have done… curled up in the fetal position in the corner of the room to suck my thumb and cry? Nah… no thanks.

But I do have to say, it has taken work to find the humor, to get fresh perspective. And like anything else, it’s a choice you make each and every minute of the day. Do you give in to gloom and depression or do you work your way through it and do the things you know work for you? Namely, getting your smile back, finding ways to laugh and be playful, and putting things in perspective.

I’m not saying it’s easy and some days, you may just want to throw yourself a small pity party. But end the party quickly and get back into creative mode. The one you bring about yourself through the power of humor which is just a laugh or two away.

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Get over yourself!

by mkwasny on April 30, 2012 at 7:58 am
Posted In: Blog

“Do not take yourself too seriously. You have to learn not to be dismayed at making mistakes. No human being can avoid failures.” — Lawrence G. Lovasik

The group of Toastmasters was a great audience. They were awake and paying attention (which is always a good thing when you’re giving a presentation) as I talked about ways they could add humor to their speeches.

I guess I could have gone over the mechanics of humor. Maybe teach something about the structure for a joke or go over in detail the concepts comedians and humorists use to evoke laughter. But anyone can pick up a book and learn humor techniques. What really bubbled to the surface as I was speaking is what I consider to be the starting point for being funny and for having more fun in your life in general. And that point is to lighten up and get over yourself!

Laugh at yourself!

When you laugh and smile, people naturally warm up to you. They are attracted to you because you give off genuine warmth and likability. And when you make them laugh at your own expense, you tell them that you’re one of them… you’re human, not perfect.

Have you made any mistakes in your life? Please pardon me if I don’t wait for your response because as long as you’re living and breathing, you’re making mistakes. The real question then becomes, how do you act or react when you make a mistake? Do you get upset? Embarrassed? Do you feel humiliated? GOOD!

It’s perfectly natural to experience a range of emotions when you make a mistake. The key is to learn how to distance yourself from the negative emotions and to laugh at the mistake… and at yourself.

We’re all human and we all make mistakes. If you want to spend the rest of your life stewing about it and making your life and the lives of those around you miserable, be my guest. But if you want to be happier and to spread smiles and joy to others, laugh at your mistake then laugh at yourself. You’ll have more fun, life will be less serious, and you’ll make this world a much better and happier place.

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Neutralize the frown

by mkwasny on April 18, 2012 at 1:08 pm
Posted In: Blog
Smiling Inupiat Woman

Photo Credit: www.alaska-in-pictures.com

I ran across this article as I was surfing the Net this morning. It’s all about the power of smiling and how it can change the way you feel just by curving up your lips into a smile. So if you’re in a bad mood and want to get out of it, the answer is pretty simple: SMILE!

When I give a speech or presentation, I like to run people through a very simple exercise. I tell my audience:

“Now, here’s what I want you to do… imagine a person or situation that is upsetting you. For the next minute, I want you to smile while you’re imagining that person or situation.”

Most everyone reports that they felt better after smiling or at least the negative feelings were neutralized. But what I find interesting is when people tell me that smiling made them feel awkward or uncomfortable. Now why would that be?

My non-scientific observation is that people just naturally fall into the default facial expression of “neutral.” We walk around during the day, not happy, not sad, but just kind of “there.” What a shame! Think about how you feel when someone approaches you with a smile. Smiles are infectious… they make us feel better, they lighten up a room, they draw others to us.

Get into the habit of smiling throughout the day. Even if you have to fake it to start, it will soon turn into a warm, generous smile that will make you feel better and make others feel the same way too. It doesn’t take much effort and the benefits are priceless.

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Back at ya

by mkwasny on April 15, 2012 at 3:39 pm
Posted In: Blog

I found this graphic over at hitupmyspot.com and it struck me as pretty profound. Life is short... make fun of it!

I got to thinking about how many of us take life on the chin and don’t fight back. You know… you get a flat tire while driving or you spill coffee on your white pants (before Labor Day, of course) or you just happened to get “downsized” from your job.

You want to know a great first response when life slaps you upside the head? Laugh at it! Yes, people will think you’re weird (or certifiably nutty) or just plain off your rocker, but what should your first response be? Why is it okay to sob or break down or scream and yell when something bad happens? What does that solve except to help your blood pressure go ballistic?

Can the solution to life’s problems be to just laugh at them? Well, it may not be THE answer, but it’s a great start. When you laugh at a problem, you take control. You put things in perspective and you do a shift that moves you from anger to at least neutral. Hopefully, it will calm you down enough so you can think creatively about solutions — like realizing that a flat tire is a great life lesson to teach your children while you sit in the front seat and supervise.

So when life throws a problem at you, throw it back while you think of a good solution, laughing the whole way through.

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Recapturing child-like joy

by mkwasny on April 11, 2012 at 6:08 am
Posted In: Blog

I’ve been doing a lot of reading on laughter lately and one thing that never ceases to boggle my mind in my reading is the statistics I come across on laughter. Depending on which source you cling to, children laugh on average 200 to 500 times per day. So I’m thinking, “Wow! If children laugh that much, we adults must really be off the charts.” Sadly, that is true, just not in a good way.

Again, depending on which statistics you stumble upon, adults (yes, those of us who were once children) laugh approximately 15 to 18 times per day. Somewhere along the transition from childhood to adulthood, we lose the one thing that we all need to be happier and healthier… the ability to laugh.

Smiling boy with cucumber eyes

I guess it’s not really all that tough to figure it out. I mean, we are all told to “grow up” and “take life seriously” to the point where our child-like sense of awe and wonder — and laughter — is pretty much beaten out of us. As a result, we become part of a grumpy population of people who don’t know how to laugh at ourselves, to make light of the world around us, or to see the joy in the every day.

But the great news is that you don’t have to resign yourself to a life of glum and ho-hum. No, all you have to do to get started is to simply observe children at work and at play. Watch as they smile, laugh, joke, and look at things in a creative way. Begin to look at the world through the eyes of a child and you’ll naturally start laughing more. Why? Because we adults take life WAY too seriously.

So go ahead… lighten up, smile, and laugh a lot more. After all, children don’t die of high blood pressure, heart attacks, and stress. That’s usually the lot of us grumpy old serious adults.

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